Alright, let’s talk about first dates. I actually went on one not too long ago, decided to give it another shot, you know? Met someone online, seemed decent enough through messages, so we planned to grab a coffee. Simple stuff.
So, I got myself ready, picked a local coffee shop, somewhere relaxed. I made sure to get there on time, found us a spot. Punctuality matters to me, sets a good tone, I think. Anyway, I sat there, waited. And waited.
What Went Down
My date eventually showed up, a good 15 minutes late. Didn’t text or anything beforehand to say they were running behind. Just strolled in, gave a quick “Sorry, traffic” and that was it. Okay, fine, traffic happens, but the lack of a heads-up felt a bit disrespectful right off the bat. Like my waiting around wasn’t a big deal.
We ordered our coffees. I noticed they were kinda short with the person behind the counter. Not outright nasty, but just… dismissive? No ‘please’, no ‘thank you’. It rubbed me the wrong way. How you treat people doing their job, that says a lot.
Then we sat down to talk. Or, should I say, they talked. A lot. About their job, their amazing accomplishments, their terrible exes (seriously, way too much detail about past relationships), their opinions on everything. It felt less like a conversation and more like a monologue I was just sitting through.
Here’s what really got me though:
- The Phone: Constantly checking it. Not just quick glances, but actually scrolling through feeds while I was trying to talk. Made me feel like I was boring them, or just not important enough for their full attention.
- No Questions Asked: They barely asked anything about me. When I tried to share something about my own life or interests, the conversation quickly steered back to them. It felt very one-sided.
- The Vibe: Overall, it just felt… off. A bit arrogant, maybe? Definitely self-absorbed. There wasn’t much warmth or genuine interest in getting to know me as a person.
My Takeaway
Look, maybe they were just nervous, or having a bad day. But for me, these things stacked up. The lateness without warning, the rudeness to staff, the non-stop talking about themselves, ignoring me for their phone, and showing zero curiosity about who I am – those felt like pretty clear signals. Red flags, basically.
It told me this person likely wasn’t very considerate or maybe lacked self-awareness. And on a first date, you’re supposed to be putting your best foot forward, right? If this is the best foot, I wasn’t keen on seeing the rest.
So yeah, I finished my coffee politely, made my excuses, and left. No second date planned, obviously. It’s just not worth investing more time when the initial signs point towards incompatibility or just plain bad manners. Better to trust your gut feeling on these things early on. That’s just my experience, anyway.
