Well, let me tell ya somethin’ ’bout this… this thing, this… “home flesh light.” Folks keep whisperin’ ’bout it, so I figured, why not spill the beans, country-style?
What in tarnation is a home flesh light?
Now, from what I gather, this here “flesh light” contraption is somethin’ for the fellas. You know, for…pleasure. Like them city folk say, it’s a “male sex toy.” Looks like somethin’ you wouldn’t show your grandma, that’s for sure. It ain’t a real woman, no sirree. It’s like… well, it’s a thing, shaped like, you know… a… a… private part, but made of… stuff. Not flesh and blood, mind you. More like… rubbery, I guess.
Why would a fella want one of them things?
- For the Fun of It: Listen, boys will be boys, as they say. Sometimes, a fella just wants to, you know, feel good. Nothin’ wrong with that, long as you ain’t hurtin’ nobody. This here thing, it’s all about… pleasure. Yeah, that’s the word the youngins use. Pleasure. It’s supposed to make a fella feel… good. That’s what they say, anyhow.
- For Better “Performance” they say: I heard some fellas sayin’ it helps ‘em, you know, get better in the bedroom. With their wives, I mean! Not sure how that works, but they claim it helps ‘em last longer. Like trainin’ for a big race, I guess. Gotta practice if you wanna win, right?
- To Help with Problems: Some young fellas, they got problems, you know? Things don’t always work like they’re supposed to. They say this here thing can help with that too. Help ‘em get a handle on things, so to speak.
But is it any good? That’s the real question.
Well, I ain’t used one myself, mind you! But from what I hear, it’s a mixed bag. Some fellas swear by it. Say it’s the best thing since sliced bread. Others, well, they ain’t so impressed. They say it ain’t the same as the real deal. And you know what? I reckon they’re right. Nothin’ beats the real thing, that’s what I always say.
But I also reckon it ain’t for me to judge. If a fella wants to use one of them things, that’s his business. Long as he’s respectful and ain’t hurtin’ nobody, I don’t see the harm. Though I still think spending time with your wife is better. Go dancing or do something nice with her instead of spending time with a rubbery thing.
So, if you’re thinkin’ about gettin’ one, here’s what I reckon you should know:
1.
