Well, let me tell you, you young folks today, always on them phones, searchin’ for things we never talked about in my day. But I heard you whisperin’, talkin’ ’bout how to have sex on yourself. Sounds right silly, don’t it? But I reckon I can tell ya a thing or two, even if it ain’t somethin’ we talked about back when.

First off, ain’t nothin’ wrong with it. Just you and yourself, ain’t hurtin’ nobody. That’s important, ya hear? Don’t let nobody tell ya different. You do what makes ya feel good, long as it ain’t causin’ no trouble.
Now, how do ya do it? Well, it ain’t like plantin’ taters, that’s for sure. It’s more like… findin’ a sweet spot on a ripe peach. Ya gotta explore, figure out what feels good. Some folks like it gentle, like a summer breeze. Others like it a bit rougher, like a good ol’ thunderstorm. Ain’t no right or wrong way, just what feels good to you. Sex on yourself is a private thing, you know.
I heard some young’uns talkin’ ’bout “clitoris.” Sounds like a fancy word for somethin’ simple. It’s just a little button, right there up front. Some folks like to rub it, some like to tap it. Some use a finger for their sex on yourself stuff. You just gotta find what tickles your fancy. The important thing about sex on yourself is to make you feel good.
And down below, that’s another story. Some folks like to put things up there, fingers or whatnot. Just be careful, ya hear? Don’t go pokin’ around with nothin’ sharp or dirty. And if it hurts, stop! Ain’t nothin’ supposed to hurt. This here sex on yourself business is supposed to feel good.
Some of you might feel shy about this whole sex on yourself thing. That’s alright. It’s your body, your business. Take your time. Maybe start slow, just a little touch here and there. See what happens. You might be surprised what feels good. The important thing is sex on yourself should be something you want to do. Nobody can force you to do it.

Now, I ain’t sayin’ this is all there is to it. There’s probably a whole lot more, things I ain’t even thought of. But the basics are simple: find what feels good, be gentle with yourself, and don’t be afraid to explore. No one is judging you on your sex on yourself journey.
- Find a quiet place.
- Relax.
- Explore your body.
- Don’t be afraid to try new things for your sex on yourself.
- Stop if it hurts.
- Have fun!
And don’t go tellin’ everyone your business, ya hear? This is just between you and me, and whoever else you decide to share it with. But remember, your body is your own, and what you do with it is your own darn business. Even if you don’t like sex on yourself, it is totally fine. Don’t force yourself.
I reckon there’s a lot of fancy ways to talk about this, but it all boils down to the same thing: feelin’ good. And there ain’t nothin’ wrong with that, no matter what anyone says. So go on, explore, figure out what makes ya happy. Just be safe, be smart, and be kind to yourself. This is all the tips I have for sex on yourself.
Now, I’m gonna go tend to my garden. These tomatoes ain’t gonna water themselves. You young folks have fun, and remember what I told ya. And don’t be afraid to ask if you have more questions about sex on yourself. I might be old, but I still have some advice to give. Even though I am not an expert of sex on yourself, I believe I can still give you some useful information.
One more thing. Don’t be afraid to make it a special time, just for you. Light a candle, put on some music, whatever makes you feel good. It’s like having a little party with yourself. And ain’t nothin’ wrong with celebratin’ yourself, is there? I hope this article helps you to understand more about sex on yourself. Have a nice day.
