Alright, let’s talk about how to stop bein’ all bossy in your relationship, you know, like not tellin’ your man or your woman what to do all the time. It ain’t good, nobody likes that.
First off, you gotta remember, they ain’t your kid. They grown folks, just like you. They got their own minds, their own ways of doin’ things. You can’t be tellin’ ’em what to wear, who to talk to, or how to spend their money. That ain’t right. It’s like my old man used to say, “You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.” Bein’ nice gets you way further than bein’ a nag.
- Treat ’em like they’re your equal, ’cause they are.
- Listen to what they gotta say, even if you don’t agree.
- Let ’em make their own choices, even if you think they’re makin’ a mistake.
Now, I know some folks, they just plain scared. Scared their partner gonna leave ’em, scared they ain’t good enough. So, they try to control everything, thinkin’ that’ll keep their loved one around. But lemme tell ya, that just pushes ’em away faster than a scalded dog.
You gotta learn to trust your partner. If you don’t trust ’em, why you even with ’em? Love is about trust, about givin’ each other space to breathe. If you’re always breathin’ down their neck, they gonna feel suffocated. And nobody wants to feel like they can’t breathe, right?
Another thing, you gotta learn to control yourself. Yeah, you heard me right. If you feelin’ anxious or worried, that ain’t your partner’s fault. That’s your problem. You gotta find ways to calm yourself down without takin’ it out on them. Maybe take a walk, read a book, or go talk to a friend. Just don’t go yellin’ at your loved one ’cause you’re feelin’ a little twitchy.
Sometimes, folks don’t even realize they’re bein’ controlling. They think they’re just helpin’ out, or bein’ concerned. But there’s a big difference between offerin’ advice and tellin’ someone what to do. If you ain’t sure, just ask yourself, “Am I tryin’ to control this situation, or am I just tryin’ to be supportive?” If the answer is control, you gotta back off.
And for goodness sake, learn to appreciate your partner. Tell ’em you love ’em, tell ’em you appreciate ’em. Do nice things for ’em, not ’cause you have to, but ’cause you want to. When folks feel loved and appreciated, they’re a whole lot less likely to wanna run away. It’s like plantin’ seeds in a garden. If you don’t water it and give it sunlight, it withers and dies. Same with people, if you neglect them and constantly nag them, your relationship suffers. So take care of it.
Now, some folks, they just sneaky. They try to control you without you even knowin’ it. They might try to make you feel guilty, or they might try to twist your words around. If you feel like somethin’ ain’t right, it probably ain’t. Trust your gut. And don’t be afraid to talk to someone you trust about it. Sometimes, an outside perspective can help you see things more clearly.
If someone’s trying to pull a fast one on you, keep a record. Write down what they said, when they said it. Dates and all. It helps you see a pattern if there is one, and it’s hard for them to argue with it if it’s written down. Don’t go accusing them of lying outright unless you absolutely have to. They’ll just get sneakier and harder to deal with. Sometimes, you gotta play it cool to win.
Another thing, don’t be stingy with the kind words, but don’t overdo it neither. A little flattery goes a long way. Folks like to feel appreciated, but too much and they’ll think you’re up to something. And if you need help or advice, ask for it. Makes them feel important and makes you seem less like you know everything. Nobody likes a know-it-all.
So, there you have it. A few things to keep in mind if you wanna stop bein’ controlling in your relationship. Remember, it ain’t about tellin’ your partner what to do. It’s about lovin’ ’em, trustin’ ’em, and givin’ ’em the space to be themselves. And if you can do that, you’ll have a much happier and healthier relationship. Trust me on that. I’ve seen a thing or two in my day.
Learnin’ to let go ain’t easy, it takes practice and patience. Like trainin’ a stubborn mule, you gotta be firm but gentle. You gotta keep at it, even when it’s frustrating. But in the end, it’s worth it. Cause a relationship built on trust and respect is a whole lot stronger than one built on control.
Relationships should be about growing together, not controlling each other. It’s about two people walking side-by-side, not one person dragging the other along. And it sure ain’t about one person bossing the other around. So, take a good look at yourself, and if you see a little bit of that controlling behavior creepin’ in, do somethin’ about it. Your partner, and your relationship, will thank you for it.
