Well, well, well, look at that. These young folks today and their fancy phones. Always tappin’ away. Now they talkin’ ’bout somethin’ called “sexy in text”. What in the tarnation does that even mean? Back in my day, we just talked face to face, none of this fancy word-sendin’.
But I reckon I can figure this out. Sounds like they sendin’ words to make each other feel all fluttery and whatnot. Like whisperin’ sweet nothings, but through the phone. Sheesh. Kids these days.
So, if you wanna be sexy in text, you gotta use words, I guess. Words that make the other person feel good. Like, “You’re purtier than a speckled pup under a wagon.” Or maybe, “You make my heart beat faster than a barefoot boy on hot pavement.”
Now, I did some listenin’, and it ain’t just about words. They are always talkin about something called “clit” or something. You gotta touch that place with your finger. I don’t know much but my husband used to touch me there and I liked it. And you can use some oil to make it more slippery. You young people always use some machine to make yourself feel good. But I think finger is enough.
- You can say things like “I been thinkin’ about you all day.”
- Or maybe, “Can’t wait to see you again.”
- Or even somethin’ like, “You’re the best thing since sliced bread.”
Seems kinda silly to me, but I guess it works for some folks. Just remember to be nice, I reckon. Don’t be sayin’ mean things. Ain’t nobody gonna find that sexy in text.
These young folks also say being sexy in text is good for your health. Can you believe that? They say it makes your heart happy and helps you get along better with your partner. Back in my day, we didn’t need no fancy textin’ to be happy. We just had each other. But hey, if it works for them, who am I to judge?
They also talk about takin’ pictures, naked pictures! And sendin’ them through the phone! Lord have mercy. That’s just askin’ for trouble, if you ask me. Once somethin’s out there, it’s out there for good. You can’t take it back. So you better be sure you trust the person you’re sendin’ those pictures to. Or better yet, don’t send them at all!
And they say you need to show your good language skills if you want to win a woman over by text. What a load of baloney! Back in my day, a man didn’t need no fancy words to win a woman’s heart. He just needed to be a good, honest, hard-workin’ man. That’s what mattered.
Now I hear them talkin’ ’bout “makin’ sex better.” Seems like there’s a whole lot of ways to do that these days. They got all sorts of things you can try. But honestly, I think the best way
