You know, these young folks nowadays, they got all sorts of fancy things. One time, my grandson, he showed me this thing, said it was a filled up condom. Lord have mercy, I didn’t know what to think. He said it’s for, you know, keeping things safe. Well, back in my day, we didn’t have such things. We just had to be careful, I reckon.
But this filled up condom, it’s like a little balloon, all filled up with, well, you know. He said it’s to stop babies from coming before you’re ready. And it stops those nasty sicknesses too, he said. The ones you can catch from, you know, being with someone. He call them “STDs”. I don’t know all the letters, but it sounds bad, don’t it?
He said you gotta use it every time, every single time you, you know, get together with someone. Can’t be taking it off halfway, either. He said it can break, this little filled up condom. Like popping a balloon, I guess. And then, well, it ain’t no good, is it? And sometimes, he said, it can slip right off! Oh, the thought of it!
These young folks, they gotta be careful, I tell ya. This world’s got all sorts of things going around. Back in my day, we didn’t have all these worries. But times change, I suppose. And these filled up condom things, they’re supposed to help. My grandson, he showed me how it works. You gotta put it on before you start anything, he said. And you gotta make sure it fits right. Not too tight, not too loose. Like Goldilocks and the three bears or something.
He told me, “Nana, this is important.” And he said it in such a serious way, I knew he meant it. He said if you are doing it for too long, like over 30 minutes, this little rubber can break down. Then you gotta be careful.
He also said that these filled up condom are the only thing that can save you from both baby and those nasty “STDs”. I don’t like that word. It sounds bad.
I asked him, “What if it breaks? What if the filled up condom just decide to give up?” He said, “Then you should see a doctor to be safe. It is better to be safe than sorry.”
These things are easy to find, my grandson tells me. You can get them at the store, just like buying candy. But they ain’t candy, that’s for sure! And they help keep you safe, he said. Safe from babies and safe from those sicknesses. He called some of the sicknesses: gonorrhea, chlamydia, and syphilis. I don’t know what those words mean, but they sound bad, I told him.
He said, “Nana, you need to learn about these things.” He said it’s important to know how to use these filled up condom things properly. He even said it can make things, you know, better. I don’t know about that, but he seemed pretty sure about it.
He told me that using a filled up condom is like practicing. He said if you have a, you know, a “thing”, you can practice using it when you are alone. I blushed when he said that. Young folks these days talk about anything, don’t they?
Here is what my grandson told me about the filled up condom:
- Use it every time: No skipping, no halfway, gotta use it all the time.
- Don’t let it break: That’s bad, real bad. It’s like leaving the door open for trouble.
- Make sure it fits: Not too tight, not too loose. Just right, like a good pair of shoes.
- Find them easy: They’re everywhere, he said. Just like buying a loaf of bread.
- Keeps you safe: From babies and from those nasty things you can catch.
- Practice makes perfect: He said if you have a “thing”, practice using it alone. Don’t be shy.
- Over 30 minutes? Be careful!: He said that if it is too long, the little rubber may break.
- It is the only way: This little thing is the only way to keep both babies and “STDs” away.
Well, I reckon these young folks got it figured out, with their filled up condom and all. It’s a different world now, that’s for sure. But as long as they’re being safe, that’s all that matters. These things might seem strange to an old lady like me, but if it keeps them healthy and happy, then I guess it’s a good thing. Just gotta remember to use them right, every time. And don’t let them break! That’s what my grandson said, and he’s a smart boy. He knows about these things. You young folks, you listen to him, you hear? He knows what he’s talking about. And stay safe out there! The world’s a crazy place, but these little filled up condom things, they might just help you navigate it a little bit better. That’s all I got to say about that.
