Figuring Things Out
So, about this whole ‘lesbian coming out’ thing. It wasn’t like a switch flipped. More like a slow burn, you know? For years, I just felt… off. Didn’t quite fit the mould everyone expected. I tried, dated guys, the whole nine yards. It just never clicked right. Felt like I was reading lines from someone else’s script.
The actual realizing part? Messy. Lots of confusing thoughts. I spent a good chunk of time just thinking, turning it over in my head. Felt pretty lonely, actually. Didn’t really have anyone to bounce this stuff off of at first. Kept thinking, “Is this real? Am I making this up?” It took a while to just accept my own feelings, to stop fighting them.
Taking the First Steps
Okay, so after a lot of internal back-and-forth, I decided I couldn’t just keep it all locked up. It was eating at me. Felt heavy. I figured I had to tell someone. Made a list in my head, who felt safest? Landed on my oldest friend, Sarah. Known her since forever.
Picking up the phone felt like lifting a brick. Seriously. Stared at her contact name for ages. Finally just hit dial before I could chicken out again. The conversation itself? A bit awkward, stumbled over my words. But I got it out. Just said, “Look, I think I’m gay.” Simple as that.
- Her reaction? Pretty chill, actually. Asked a few questions. Mostly just listened.
- That first one was the hardest. Felt like a dam broke afterwards, just a little bit.
- It wasn’t some huge dramatic movie scene. Just… quiet relief.
The Ripple Effect
Telling Sarah gave me a bit more courage. So, I started telling a few more people. Close family, a couple other friends. Each time was different. Some were great, super supportive. Others? A bit confused, maybe a little uncomfortable. Had one or two reactions that stung, not gonna lie. But you deal with it, right? You figure out who your real support system is.
It wasn’t a one-time announcement. More like a series of conversations over months, even years. Still happens sometimes, meeting new people. It gets easier though. Less like this huge, scary confession and more just… stating a fact about myself. Like saying I have brown hair.
Where I’m At Now
Looking back, it was a process. Definitely a practice in being honest, first with myself, then with others. It wasn’t easy, lots of bumps. But living authentically? Yeah, that feels way better than pretending. Life feels simpler now, less cluttered with hiding things. It’s not perfect, life never is, but it feels more… mine. Just getting on with it, really.
