So, I got this idea in my head, right? About figuring out the exact ‘type’ of person I wanted to date. It sounds kinda silly now, but back then, I thought I could maybe, like, optimize the whole finding someone process. You know, be efficient about it.
Getting Started – The List
First thing I did, I actually sat down and tried to write it all out. Made a list. Sounds kinda clinical, I know. I grabbed a notebook, the old paper kind, not even on the computer. I started writing down things I thought were important. Stuff like:
- Likes dogs: Yeah, that was high up. Gotta love dogs.
- Enjoys quiet nights in sometimes: I’m not always about going out.
- Has their own thing going on: You know, independent. Doesn’t need me for everything.
- Good sense of humor: This one’s tricky, ’cause what’s funny, right? But I put it down anyway.
I kept adding stuff. Little things, big things. Physical stuff? Yeah, a bit, but mostly personality traits. I thought if I had this perfect blueprint, I could just, I dunno, spot ‘her’ easier. Or maybe filter better on those dating apps everyone was using.
Putting it to the Test (Sort Of)
Okay, so I had my list. Now what? I tried using it. When I was chatting with people online, I’d kinda mentally check things off. Sounds bad, doesn’t it? Like I was interviewing them for a job. It felt weird pretty fast. People aren’t lists. You can’t just tick boxes.
I remember one time I was talking to someone who seemed great, really clicked. But then I realized she didn’t quite match, like, point number seven on my stupid list. And I actually hesitated! For a second, I thought, “Well, she’s not the ‘type’…” How dumb is that?
The Realization Hit
It didn’t take long to figure out this whole ‘typing’ exercise was kinda pointless. Or at least, the way I was doing it. Life just doesn’t work like that. You don’t punch in parameters and get the perfect person delivered.
What actually happened was I met someone totally unexpected. We met through a friend, completely random. She probably didn’t tick half the boxes on that original list I made. She liked cats more than dogs (we compromised, we now have both), she loved going out dancing (which I learned to enjoy sometimes), and her sense of humor was different but brilliant.
It just worked. None of the pre-planning mattered. The connection was just there. All that time I spent trying to define the ‘type’, I could have just been out there, you know, living and meeting people.
What I Think Now
Looking back, making that list wasn’t entirely useless. It helped me figure out what I valued, deep down. But trying to use it like some kind of instruction manual for finding a partner? Yeah, that was a mistake. People are way more complex and interesting than any list you could ever write down.
So, yeah. That was my attempt at finding the ‘type’. Ended up finding someone great by throwing the list out the window. Funny how that works, huh?
