So, I’ve been thinking a lot about authenticity, especially in how I relate to people. I decided to really put some effort into being more genuine in my interactions, and let me tell you, it’s been a bit of a rollercoaster.
The Starting Point
I started by just observing myself. Like, really paying attention to how I act in different situations. I noticed I had this habit of, you know, kind of mirroring people. If someone was super enthusiastic, I’d amp myself up. If they were quiet, I’d tone it down. It wasn’t even conscious, just something I did.
The Experiment
Then came the hard part – actually changing things. I decided to focus on one relationship first, my friend Sarah. We hang out a lot, and I realized I often just agreed with whatever she said, even if I didn’t really feel that way. So, I made a conscious effort to express my own opinions, even if they were different.
- First step: I started small. Like, disagreeing about a movie we watched. It felt awkward at first, like I was breaking some unwritten rule.
- Next: I tried sharing more personal stuff. Things I usually kept to myself, like anxieties or little insecurities. That was even tougher.
- The biggest change: I tried that I will be honest about how I feel, I would express my emotions instead of hiding them.
The Results (and the Messy Bits)
Honestly? It was mixed. Sometimes, it was amazing. Like, Sarah and I had this super deep conversation about something we’d never talked about before, and it felt like we were really connecting on a whole new level. I felt lighter, like I wasn’t carrying around this fake persona.
But other times, it was… uncomfortable. There were a few awkward silences. Once, I think I even offended her a little bit, unintentionally. It made me want to just go back to my old ways, to being agreeable and easygoing.
What I Learned(The reflection)
But I stuck with it. And I’m glad I did. Because even the uncomfortable moments taught me something. They taught me that real connection isn’t always smooth. It’s okay to disagree. It’s okay to be vulnerable. It’s okay to be… messy.I realized that it’s better to be honestly myself than to be liked for someone I’m not.
It’s still a work in progress, obviously. I’m not suddenly this perfectly authentic person. But I’m trying. And I think that’s what matters. I’m learning to be more real, one awkward conversation at a time. And it feels… good. Really good.
