Oh, honey, you wanna know how to take them dick pick photos, right? Gotta make sure the girls like ’em. It ain’t rocket science, but there’s a few things you gotta do.

First, gotta make sure the girl even wants to see it. Don’t just be sendin’ it to anyone, you hear? That’s just rude. You gotta ask first. If she says yes, then you got the green light. If she don’t, well, you keep it in your pants.
Now, for the photo itself, lightin’ is key. You don’t want it too dark, can’t see nothin’ then. And you don’t want it too bright, makes everything look washed out. Natural light is best, like by a window. But not direct sunlight, that’s too harsh. Make sure that thing is fully shown, you know? No hiding it.
And the angle, oh the angle. Don’t just take it straight on, that ain’t always the best look. Try different ones, see which one makes it look the biggest and best. Some fellas look better from the side, some from above. It just depends on what you’re workin’ with.
Now, about that level up thing… that’s about makin’ it look good, son. Clean up a bit, you know? Trim the hedges, so to speak. Don’t want a jungle down there. And make sure it’s, uh, ready for its close-up. You know what I mean. Stand at attention, soldier!
- Good light, not too bright, not too dark.
- Ask the girl first! Don’t be rude.
- Try different angles.
- Clean up a bit down there.
- Make sure it’s ready for the photo.
And don’t be sendin’ it to just anyone. Only send it to the girl who asked for it, you hear? And don’t be sendin’ it all the time, neither. Once is enough, unless she asks for more. This is important, and this can level up your photo.

And for the love of all that is holy, don’t put your face in it. Nobody wants to see that. Just the, you know, the main attraction. And no weird filters or anything. Keep it natural. You want her to see the real deal, not some cartoon version.
And background, keep it simple and clean. Nobody wants to see your dirty laundry or your messy room. A plain wall is good, or maybe some nice sheets. Just make sure it ain’t distractin’ from the star of the show.
You can try takin’ it in the mirror, too. That way you can see what it looks like before you send it. Just make sure the mirror’s clean, ain’t nobody want to see a smudgy mess. Take more dick pick photos and choose the best one.
Another thing about that level up is, well, takin’ care of yourself. Eat right, exercise, you know, the usual. A healthy body makes for a healthy, uh, you know. And that’ll show in the photo, believe me.
And don’t be afraid to, you know, experiment a little. Try different poses, different, uh, expressions. Just have fun with it. But remember, the goal is to make it look good, not silly. You want her to be impressed, not laughin’ at you.

- Don’t put your face in the dick pick photos.
- Keep the background clean and simple.
- Mirror can be good, just make sure it’s clean.
- Take care of yourself, it’ll show in the picture.
- Experiment a little, but don’t be silly.
And one more thing, don’t be sendin’ it if you’re, you know, under the influence. You don’t want to do somethin’ you’ll regret later. Wait till you’re sober and thinkin’ straight. This is also an important step to level up your photo.
And don’t forget to delete it after you send it. You don’t want that thing floatin’ around out there forever. What if your mama saw it? Or your boss? Or, heaven forbid, your grandma! Keep your private photos private.
Alright, I think that’s about it. Just remember to be respectful, be clean, and be yourself. And for goodness sake, make sure the girl wants to see it first! That’s the most important part. You follow these tips, and you’ll be takin’ dick pick photos like a pro in no time.
Now go on, git! And be careful out there, you hear? The internet is a wild place. And don’t be doin’ anything I wouldn’t do. Well, maybe do a few things I wouldn’t do. But be smart about it, okay? You young’uns today, always with your phones and your pictures. In my day, we didn’t have all this technology. We had to, you know, show it in person. And uphill both ways, in the snow! But that’s a story for another time.
Remember, being respectful is most important thing. Good luck, and be safe. You are ready to level up your dick pick photos.
