Okay, so lately, I’ve felt like my husband and I were more like roommates than, you know, partners. We were just going through the motions. Wake up, work, kids, dinner, sleep, repeat. So I decided to do something about it. I figured we needed to actually connect again, not just coexist.
Operation: Reconnect
First, I ditched the phones. Seriously. After dinner, we put them in a drawer. Out of sight, out of mind. It’s amazing how much more you talk when you’re not staring at a screen.
- Step 1: No phones after 8 PM. Brutal at first, but worth it.
Next, I started asking him about his day. Not just a “how was work?” grunt, but really asking. Like, “What was the most challenging thing you dealt with today?” or “Did anything make you laugh today?” It sounds simple, but it made a huge difference. He actually started opening up!
- Step 2: Ask real questions. Listen to the answers.
Then came the scary part. We used to have date nights and I brought it back to the table.
I booked a babysitter. We haven’t had a real date night in… well, I can’t even remember. I was nervous, he was probably nervous (though he wouldn’t admit it), but we went out for dinner. Just the two of us.

- Step3:Date night it is.
At dinner, we actually, you know, talked. We reminisced about old times, laughed about stupid things, and even made some plans for the future. It felt…good. Really good.
We also started doing one small thing together every day. Sometimes it’s just watching a show together (again, no phones!), other times it’s taking a walk around the block after the kids are in bed. It’s nothing huge, but it’s something.
- Step 4: Small, daily connections. Even 15 minutes makes a difference.
Finally, I tried to be more…affectionate. Little things, like holding his hand when we’re watching TV, or giving him a hug for no reason. It felt awkward at first, like I was forcing it, but it quickly became natural again.
- Step5:Don’t underestimate physical touch.
It’s not perfect, and we’re definitely still a work in progress, but it’s better. We’re connecting again. We’re remembering why we fell in love in the first place. It’s not about grand gestures; it’s about the small, everyday things that show you care. And honestly, it all started with putting down those darn phones!