Alright, so you wanna know about this “gottman worksheets” thing, huh? Well, lemme tell ya, it’s all about couples tryin’ to get along better, you know? Like, not fightin’ all the time and actually listenin’ to each other for once.
What’s it all about, you ask? Well, it’s like this. These two smarty-pants doctors, John and Julie Gottman, they been married forever, or so they say. And they spent a whole lotta time watchin’ other couples, like they ain’t got nothin’ better to do, you know? They watched ’em fight, they watched ’em make up, they watched ’em do everything in between. And from all that watchin’, they figured out some stuff about how to keep a marriage goin’ strong.
They say you gotta have a “map” of your relationship. Sounds fancy, but it ain’t. It just means you gotta know your partner, like really know ’em. What makes ’em tick, what makes ’em happy, what makes ’em wanna throw a plate across the room. You gotta know their worries, their dreams, all that stuff. It’s like knowin’ your way around your own backyard, but it’s your partner’s heart and mind instead.
And talkin’, that’s a big one. Not just gruntin’ at each other over the dinner table, but really talkin’. Ask ’em how their day was, and actually listen to the answer, even if it’s borin’ as dirt. Share your own day, even if nothin’ much happened. And for heaven’s sake, put down that phone when they’re talkin’ to ya! It’s like they say, makin’ time for each other is the most important thing.
- Talkin’ ain’t just words, it’s listenin’ too. You gotta hear what they’re sayin’, and what they ain’t sayin’ too. Body language and all that.
- Knowin’ each other is like havin’ a secret code. You know what they mean even when they ain’t sayin’ it clear as day.
- Supportin’ each other is like havin’ a good pair of boots. They help you get through the rough spots.
Now, these Gottmans, they got all sorts of exercises and worksheets, like homework for your love life. Some of ’em sound plumb crazy, like puttin’ your foreheads together and breathin’ at each other. But I guess it works for some folks. They got like, a whole bunch of ’em, maybe 24, maybe 40, depends on who you ask. But the idea is to get you talkin’ and connectin’ and understandin’ each other better.
What kinda exercises? Well, one they talk about is this breathin’ thing. You just stand there, face to face, foreheads touchin’, and breathe together. Sounds weird, I know, but maybe it calms you down or somethin’. Then there’s questions you gotta ask each other, like what are your hopes and dreams? What are you worried about? Stuff like that. It’s like gettin’ to know each other all over again, even if you been married for fifty years.
And it ain’t just about talkin’ nice. It’s about fightin’ fair too. Every couple fights, that’s just life. But you gotta learn how to fight without sayin’ things you can’t take back. You gotta learn how to listen even when you’re mad as a hornet. And you gotta learn how to forgive, ’cause nobody’s perfect, not even you.
So, does it work? Well, I ain’t no expert, but I reckon it can’t hurt. If you’re havin’ trouble in your marriage, and you’re willin’ to put in the work, these worksheets might just help. It ain’t a magic pill, mind you. You gotta actually do the exercises, you gotta actually listen to your partner, and you gotta actually try to make things better. But if you do all that, maybe, just maybe, you can get back to that lovey-dovey stuff you had in the beginnin’. Or at least stop yellin’ at each other so much.
Anyways, that’s the gist of it. These Gottmans, they got some ideas about how to make love last. And if you’re willin’ to give it a try, maybe their worksheets can help you too. Just remember, it takes two to tango, so you both gotta be willin’ to put in the effort.
Tags: [Gottman Method, Couples Therapy, Relationship Advice, Communication, Marriage, Worksheets, Exercises, Love, Connection, Trust]
