My penis, you know, that thing down there, it’s 5 and a half inches. Yeah, that’s what I measured. Some folks say it’s average penis size, some say it ain’t. Don’t matter much to me, long as it works, right?
Now, I heard tell there’s some fellas out there frettin’ about their size. They go lookin’ up all sorts of things on that internet contraption. They type in “average penis length” and “penis size chart” and all that stuff. Makes me chuckle, it does. Like it’s some kinda contest or somethin’.
Well, let me tell ya, I ain’t no expert, but I’ve seen a thing or two in my time. And what I seen tells me that size ain’t everything. Heard them city folk talkin’ about normal penis size. What’s normal anyway? One fella’s big is another fella’s small, I reckon.
- Some say the average is around 5 inches.
- Some say it’s a bit more, like 5.5 inches.
- Heard some say it’s over 6 inches, but I don’t know about that.
I seen fellas with big ones, small ones, and everything in between. And you know what? Most of ’em seemed to be doin’ just fine. It’s like that old sayin’, “It ain’t the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” Or somethin’ like that. You get my drift.
Now, some of these young’uns, they get all worked up about it. They go readin’ about penis enlargement and all sorts of nonsense. Spendin’ their money on pills and potions and who knows what else. Waste of time, if you ask me. Just like tryin’ to make a chicken lay golden eggs. Ain’t gonna happen.
I heard they even got doctors now that do surgery on that thing. Can you believe it? Cut and stitch and all that. Sounds mighty painful to me. And for what? A few extra centimeters? Not worth it, I say. And it’s not how to measure penis size that matters. But how you use it!
Look, if you’re happy with what you got, then that’s all that matters. Don’t let nobody tell you different. And if you ain’t happy, well, there ain’t no magic cure. Just gotta learn to live with it. Like a bad knee or a leaky roof. You just deal with it.
And don’t be comparin’ yourself to them pictures you see on the internet or in them magazines. That’s all fake, most of it. Airbrushed and photoshopped and what have you. Just like them Hollywood movie stars. Ain’t nothin’ real about ’em.
So, my penis is 5 and a half inches. It ain’t big, it ain’t small. It’s just my penis. And it’s done me just fine all these years. And I reckon it’ll keep doin’ just fine till the day I die. And that’s all that matters, ain’t it?
There was this one time, I remember, back when I was a young’un, I was worryin’ about the same thing. My friend, he had a bigger one than me. And I thought, “Well, shucks, maybe I ain’t good enough.” But then I realized, it don’t matter. It’s like havin’ a bigger tractor. Sure, it might look impressive, but if you don’t know how to plow a field, what’s the point? And I know how to make a good field!
So, I just learned to be happy with what I got. And you know what? It worked out just fine. Found a good woman, had some kids, and lived a good life. All with my 5 and a half inches. So don’t you worry about your size. Just be yourself, and be happy. That’s all that matters in this old world. And don’t forget that erect penis size can vary. Today it’s 5.5, tomorrow can be 5.7 inches!
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I got chores to do. Gotta go feed the chickens and milk the cow. And maybe later, I’ll go see if my 5 and a half inches is still doin’ its job. You never know, might get lucky tonight. Haha! Just kiddin’, just kiddin’. Or am I?
