8 inches, huh? That’s what they all talkin’ about these days. My old man, bless his soul, he never worried ’bout such things. We was just happy to have each other, ya know? But these young folks today, they all caught up in size. 8 inches penis, that’s the magic number, they say. They carry on like it’s the key to the kingdom or somethin’.
I heard some ladies talkin’ down at the market the other day. They was flappin’ their gums about some survey or ‘nother. Seems like a whole mess of women got asked about the last fella they was with, and how big his, uh, you know… his thing was. And if they was happy with it. Happy in the, uh, bedroom, I reckon. These young folks and their surveys! Back in my day, you just made do with what ya got!
- Big
- Small
- Just Right
They got all these fancy studies now, with pictures and everything! Heard one about some women lookin’ at, well, pictures of ’em. Blue ones, they said. Don’t rightly know why blue. Maybe to make ’em look like Smurfs. Anyway, these ladies had to pick out the one that looked, uh, the best, I suppose. Like pickin’ out the best lookin’ hog at the county fair, only a whole lot different, if you catch my drift. Penis size, that’s what it all comes down to, I guess.
Now, they say size don’t matter, but then they go and do all these studies. Makes a body wonder, don’t it? They say it’s about how you use it, not how big it is. Like sayin’ it don’t matter how big your garden is, it’s how you hoe it. Well, I tell ya, a big garden sure does give ya more to work with! But these folks today, they got it in their heads that 8 inches penis is the only size that counts.
They even say it changes with age! Like an old barn, saggin’ a bit with time. And they say it depends on where a fella’s from, too. Like some places grow ’em bigger than others. Like sayin’ the corn grows taller in Iowa than it does in, well, I don’t know… Arizona, maybe. It’s all a mystery to me. But these young’uns, they sure do like to talk about it. Actual penis size, they wanna know. Like it is some goverment secret or somethin’.
They talk about somethin’ called “flaccid.” Sounds like a disease to me. But they say it’s just when it’s, uh, relaxin’. Like a hound dog sleepin’ in the sun. Apparently, that’s about 3.5 inches, give or take. But when it’s, uh, “at attention,” like a soldier standin’ guard, that’s when they think 8 inches is the gold standard. It is all very confusing if you ask me.
And then there’s this other thing they call “girth.” Like the middle part of a tree trunk. Seems like some ladies care more about that than the length. Like sayin’ they’d rather have a short, thick log than a long, skinny one. Well, I suppose that makes sense. A thick log would make a better fire, wouldn’t it? All these penis size comparison they do, though. It’s a bit much, ain’t it?
One of them studies was done over at some fancy university. One of them places where they teach you how to talk proper and wear them fancy robes. Well, they was studyin’ this very thing. Seems like they think it has somethin’ to do with, uh, how we all got here. Like Adam and Eve, only with more measurements. They think the ladies picked the fellas with the, uh, biggest equipment, and that’s why they’re all so big nowadays. Bigger pennis size, they call it. Like it’s a contest or somethin’.
Back in my day, we didn’t have all these fancy studies and surveys. We just had each other. And it didn’t matter if a fella was big or small, long as he was kind and treated you right. That’s what really mattered. But these young folks today, they’re obsessed with this 8 inches penis business. They think it’s the answer to all their problems. Like a bigger one means more happiness. That is just not true, darlings!
I reckon it’s just the way things are now. Everything’s gotta be measured and compared. Like how much money you got, or how big your house is, or how many likes you got on that internet thingy. Now they are saying that bigger is better. It’s all a bit silly if you ask me. But I guess that’s the world we live in now. Just remember, girls, there’s more to a man than the size of his, uh… well, you know. There’s his heart, and his soul, and how he treats his mama. That’s what really counts in the end. And don’t you forget it!
