Alright, so we’re talking about lotion and, well, those fleshlight things. Yeah, I’ve been down that road a few times, you could say. It’s not exactly rocket science, but you’d be surprised how many folks mess it up or just don’t really think it through. They just grab whatever’s handy.
First off, let’s talk about the lotion. This is where most people slip up, literally.
You’d figure any old moisturizer works, right? Wrong. That’s a big nope. I learned that lesson pretty quick. I remember trying some regular hand cream I had lying around. One of those thick, greasy kinds. What a terrible idea that was. It just felt… off. Left this weird film, and honestly, it probably wasn’t doing the… uh… device any favors either. It got all gummy.
- Water-based stuff. That’s the usual advice you hear, and for once, the “everyone says” crowd is pretty much on the money. I started using that and it was way better.
- I’ve splashed out on some of the fancy, purpose-made lubes. Some are decent, I guess. Others, you’re just paying for a slick bottle and some clever marketing. They feel just like the cheaper water-based ones.
- Then you got your budget options. Sometimes they’re perfectly fine, do the job. Other times, they dry out faster than a puddle in the desert. It’s a real gamble, that.
My whole “practice” with lotions was basically a long string of trying stuff out. You pick up a bottle, you give it a go. Sometimes it’s fine, no complaints. Other times, you’re just making a sticky mess and thinking, “Well, that was a complete waste of time and I gotta clean this now.”
Then there’s the other bit, the actual fleshlight.
Man, those things. They’re all over the place in terms of design, huh? And the materials they use… some are super squishy, others have a bit more heft to them. And cleaning them? That’s a whole separate adventure. You really gotta stay on top of that, otherwise, it gets pretty grim, pretty fast. I learned to rinse it out right away.
My “record keeping” on this stuff is mostly in my head, a list of what to avoid. I had this one time, I was hunting for a new lotion. Just wandering the aisles in the local pharmacy, you know? And they always have those little impulse-buy things near the cash registers. Spotted this small, innocent-looking bottle. Looked like a travel hand sanitizer or something. Snatched it up without giving it a second glance. Got it home, squeezed some out. Turns out, it was some extra-strength, icy-hot kind of muscle rub with a ton of menthol. Definitely do not recommend that. My eyes were watering, the whole area was tingling in a very bad way. Less “fun time” and more “mild chemical assault.” Had to chuckle about it afterward, though. Such a bonehead move, even for me. You’d think I’d know better by now.
So, yeah, the whole “practice” is mostly just figuring out how not to screw it up too badly. Find a basic, no-frills, water-based lotion. Keep your gear clean. There’s no secret sauce. It’s just… things you figure out as you go. Or, more often, things you mess up and then figure out. That’s the honest truth of it. People get all worked up about finding the “perfect” combo. At the end of the day, it’s just an object and some slippery stuff. No need to write a thesis on it.
