I finally did it last Tuesday. Wrote that goodbye letter to my closest friend from college. Felt weird at first. Grabbed my laptop around 10 PM with a cold beer. Just opened Google Docs and stared at the blank page like an idiot.
Why I Even Started This Mess
After Rachel ghosted me for 5 months straight? Yeah. Saw her posting Instagram stories with new friends. Felt like a knife twist every time. Three times I tried calling – straight to voicemail. Texted “Wanna grab coffee?” crickets. So one midnight, I googled “how to end dead friendship”. That’s where I found articles about goodbye letters.
Pouring Guts Onto Keyboard
Took two tries to even start typing. First draft sounded like a Hallmark card gone wrong. Deleted everything. Second attempt? I just vomited all feelings:
- Dumped every memory – that time we got drunk on tequila and climbed library stairs at 3 AM
- Called out the elephant – “When you stopped replying last November, hurt like hell”
- Laid it flat – “Guess we grew apart. That’s okay.”
My hands were sweating buckets. Felt like running to delete it. But I hit save instead. Left it overnight like soggy leftovers.
Morning-After Regret (& Sending Anyway)
Woke up thinking “Holy crap this is embarrassing”. Almost trashed the file. Then remembered something – this wasn’t about fixing things. This was MY closure. Copied the whole mess into an email. Subject line: “Some things I needed to say”. Added her college email from 2012 that she still uses. Didn’t even write “please reply”. Just smashed that send button before chickening out. Instant panic sweats.
The Surprising Aftermath
Waited three days – total silence. Then? Magic happened:
- My constant phone-checking habit died – No more jumping at notifications
- Could finally eat lunch without stalking her Twitter
- Went hiking Sunday and didn’t think about her once
Epiphany hit me yesterday. The letter wasn’t for her – it was me slamming that chapter shut. Like finishing a crappy book and throwing it across the room. Still zero reply from Rachel. But my chest doesn’t ache anymore. Crazy how dumping feelings on paper cuts invisible chains.
