Okay, so, I gotta talk about this thing that’s been happening lately. It’s about my husband and his yelling. It’s been getting to me, and I figured I should write it down and share it, maybe get some stuff off my chest. So, here goes.
Figuring Things Out
First off, I started noticing this pattern, right? My husband, he just starts yelling out of nowhere. I mean, not all the time, but often enough that I was like, “What’s going on here?” So, I started to pay more attention, trying to figure out if there was something setting him off. You know, like playing detective in my own house.
I grabbed a notebook and started jotting down whenever he’d yell. I’d write down what we were doing, what I said, what he said, the whole shebang. After a few weeks, I started seeing some patterns. Like, he’d yell more when he was stressed from work or when we talked about money. Stuff like that.
Trying to Stay Calm
Now, I read somewhere that you shouldn’t react to yelling, so I tried that. Whenever he raised his voice, I’d try to keep mine level. It wasn’t easy, let me tell you. Inside, I was like, “Why are you yelling?” But on the outside, I was trying to be all cool and collected.
I also tried to talk to him about it, you know, when he wasn’t yelling. I’d say something like, “Hey, I noticed you’ve been yelling a lot lately. Can we talk about it?” Sometimes he’d open up, and sometimes he’d just brush it off. But I kept trying.
Setting Some Rules
Then there was this whole thing about setting boundaries. I read about it online, and it sounded like a good idea. So, I started telling him, “Look, I don’t like it when you yell. It’s not okay.” I had to say it a few times, but I think he started to get it. I mean, he still yells sometimes, but maybe a little less?
I also started to just walk away if he started yelling and I felt it was getting too much. I’d just say, “I’m going to go to the other room until we can talk calmly.” It felt weird at first, but it helped me not get sucked into the yelling too.
Getting Help
This was a big one. I started talking to my friends and family about what was going on. It felt good to get it out in the open, you know? They gave me some advice, and it was just nice to have someone to talk to. I felt so alone sometimes with all this.
I even looked up some resources online, like for domestic violence. I mean, he wasn’t hitting me or anything, but I read that yelling can be a form of abuse, so I wanted to be prepared. I found some helplines and websites, just in case things got worse.
Then I thought maybe he should talk to someone, like a counselor. I mean, I’m no expert, right? Maybe he needed some professional help to deal with his anger. I brought it up to him a few times, but he wasn’t really into the idea. But I’m still hoping he’ll consider it.
Keeping Track
- Week 1: Started the notebook. Felt weird, but also kind of helpful. Noticed he yells more on weekdays.
- Week 2: Tried the whole “staying calm” thing. It was hard. Yelled back once. Felt bad after.
- Week 3: Talked to my sister. She was supportive. Felt a little less alone.
- Week 4: Started setting boundaries. He didn’t like it at first, but I think it’s sinking in. Maybe?
- Week 5: Looked up some helplines. Felt a bit scared, but also glad they’re there.
- Week 6: Mentioned counseling to him again. He said he’d think about it. That’s something, right?
So, yeah, that’s where I’m at now. It’s been a journey, and it’s not over yet. But I feel like I’m doing something, you know? I’m not just taking it anymore. I’m trying to understand, to communicate, and to get help. It’s tough, but I’m tougher. And I just hope that things will get better. For both of us.
