So I’ve been thinking a lot about how we throw around “I love you more” like confetti at every goodbye. Last Tuesday morning, my wife mumbled it while half-asleep when I left for work, and I realized it felt… empty. Like chewing gum that lost its flavor after the third chomp. That’s when I decided to actually practice making those words mean something.
Getting Real About Why It Felt Flat
First, I grabbed my coffee and scribbled in my ratty notebook about why it felt off. Turns out I’d been saying it automatically – same tone, same situation, same everything. It became background noise instead of a spotlight. Kinda like when you drive home and suddenly realize you remember zero road signs because you’re on autopilot.
Testing Different Flavors of “More”
Thursday after dinner, I did the first experiment. When my kid finished homework early, I didn’t just ruffle his hair and say it. Instead, I knelt down, made solid eye contact and said: “When you focus like that? Yeah, I love you way more.” His eyebrows shot up like I’d given him Fortnite bucks. He actually leaned in for a second hug. Lightbulb moment: specific reasons make the “more” stick.
Then came the risky one – using it when tensions are high. Saturday morning, my wife was annoyed about overflowing trash bins. Instead of defensive mode, I took out the garbage, came back and said: “Fight or not, always gonna love you more.” Then booked it to the garage before she could react. Half-hour later, she texted a heart emoji. Shock level: seeing snow in July.
Physical Edition & Unexpected Moments
Sunday, we tried physical versions instead of verbal. Made breakfast together, and when she handed me coffee exactly how I like it, I just held her hand extra long while taking the mug. No words. Her smile lasted through three burnt pancakes. Later at the grocery store, I texted my teenager in the next aisle: “Saw those sour gummies you hate. Made me love you more LOL.” Got back “CRINGE DAD” immediately followed by “😏”. Progress.
The Surprise Attack
Monday sealed it – unexpected timing wins. My wife was elbow-deep in spreadsheet hell after work. I slid a sticky note on her laptop: “Watching you conquer chaos? Makes my love more. P.S. Wine in fridge.” Found her later grinning at that yellow square like it held lottery numbers. Physical evidence outlasts spoken words, 100%.
Biggest takeaway? Saying it less actually made it matter more. Specific beats generic, actions speak with the words, and timing is everything. Also learned my family thinks I’m turning into a “giant cheeseball” – but they’re smiling when they say it.
