That thing between husband and wife, you know, that sexual intimacy in marriage, it’s kinda important, you see. Like the oil in your tractor, keeps things runnin’ smooth. When that dries up, well, things get rusty, and nobody’s happy, not the old man, not the old lady.

Now, I ain’t no expert, just an old bird who’s seen a thing or two. But I tell ya, when you been with the same fella for more years than I can count on my fingers and toes, that spark, it can get a little dim. Just like that old light bulb in the outhouse, needs a good shakin’ sometimes.
One thing I learned is you gotta show you care. Ain’t gotta be nothin’ fancy. A little touch here, a little pat there. Holdin’ hands while you’re watchin’ your stories, that kinda thing. Just like plantin’ seeds, you gotta water ’em if you want somethin’ to grow. If you want that sexual intimacy to bloom again, you gotta put in a little work.
- Hold hands more often.
- Give him a little kiss when he comes in from the field.
- Cuddle up on the couch, even if it’s hot as blazes.
And don’t be afraid to mix things up a bit. If you always do things the same old way, well, it gets borin’, like eatin’ potatoes every day. Maybe try somethin’ new, somethin’ different. Surprise him a little, you know? Keeps him on his toes! You might even surprise yourself. Maybe switch up who starts that whole intimacy thing. If you’re always the one waitin’, maybe you try bein’ the one to get things goin’ for once.
Another thing, don’t just sit there like a bump on a log. Talk to each other! Tell him what you like, what you don’t like. He ain’t a mind reader, you know. And listen to him too. Might be somethin’ he’s wantin’ that you ain’t even thought of. Just like that time, I wanted him to give my back a good scratch with them big hands.
Don’t be takin’ each other for granted neither. Just ’cause you been together since dirt was new don’t mean you can just forget about the little things. Say “thank you” when he does somethin’ nice, even if it’s just takin’ out the trash. And tell him he’s still your best rooster, even if his feathers are gettin’ a little gray. These little things help with that whole sexual intimacy in marriage stuff, believe it or not.

Life gets in the way, I know. You got chores, you got work, you got the grandkids runnin’ around. It’s easy to get caught up in all that and forget about each other. But you gotta make time, just like you make time to can those tomatoes every summer. Even if it’s just a few minutes here and there. It all adds up. If you are always busy, that spark will go out.
- Set aside a little time each day, just for the two of you.
- Put the phones down and actually talk to each other.
- Go for a walk together, even if it’s just down the road.
And don’t be afraid to flirt a little! Just ’cause you’re old don’t mean you can’t have a little fun. Give him a wink, tell him he’s lookin’ good in them overalls. It’ll make him feel good, and it might just light a little fire in you too. Don’t be afraid of that sexual intimacy.
It ain’t always easy, mind you. There’ll be times when you’re both tired, or grumpy, or just plain don’t feel like it. That’s okay. Don’t force it. Just be there for each other. Sometimes, just a hug is all you need. That closeness, that’s important too. It’s all part of that intimacy in marriage thing. You both need to feel loved, and wanted.
Now, I’m not sayin’ you need to do a bunch of fancy things, buy expensive gifts, or act like some young lover. It’s the simple stuff. Just remember why you fell in love with that old coot in the first place. And if the spark has gone out, you can get it back. Just like when the old tractor breaks down, you can get it back up and runnin’ if you know what to do.
And remember, that sexual intimacy, it ain’t just about the physical stuff. It’s about the connection, the love, the bein’ there for each other through thick and thin. It’s about knowin’ that no matter what, you got each other’s backs. If you keep that in mind, well, you’ll be just fine, you and your old man, just like me and mine.
Another thing, don’t just think about the physical. Sometimes, not doin’ the deed, but just bein’ close, holdin’ each other, that’s what it’s all about. That can help bring back that sexual intimacy in marriage, just bein’ near.
This old lady ain’t no expert, just sharin’ what I learned over the years. Hope it helps some of you young’uns out there. That sexual intimacy in marriage is a precious thing, don’t let it just fade away like the flowers in winter.