So, you’re thinking about how to renew your vows? We actually went through that whole thing not too long ago, and I figured I’d share our little journey. It wasn’t for some huge milestone anniversary, like our 20th or 30th, nothing like that. We were, I think, around our 12th year, and honestly, life had just been… well, life. You know, kids, work, the usual whirlwind. We just felt we needed a moment, a real pause, to look at each other and kind of reaffirm things, say, ‘Hey, we’re still doing this, and it’s still pretty good.’
First thing we talked about was what we didn’t want. Another massive wedding? Absolutely not. We’d been there, done that, and I’ve still got the dress packed away that definitely wouldn’t fit anymore! We were aiming for something small, really personal. Something that felt like it was just for us, maybe with a few super close people there.
Then came the actual figuring-it-out part. Budget-wise, we didn’t go nuts. The whole point was to keep it low-key and meaningful, not break the bank. Most of what we spent went on a nice meal afterwards and a few little decorations. No complicated spreadsheets this time, thank goodness. As for guests, we thought about it a bit. Just us two? Maybe include the kids? In the end, we settled on having our kids there, and both our sets of parents. That felt right. Just a small, intimate group, the people who’ve really been with us through thick and thin.
Finding a spot was next. And you know where we picked? Our own backyard! Seriously. It’s where we spend most of our family time anyway, it’s comfortable, and, best part, it cost nothing. We just spruced it up a bit with some lights and stuff. For the person to kind of ‘lead’ the ceremony, we asked my best friend. She’s known us since before we were even a couple. She was so chuffed, and it made everything feel so much more personal than having a stranger do it.
Now, the vows. This was the most important bit for me. We decided to write new ones from scratch. Our original vows were lovely, of course, but so much had happened since then. We wanted words that reflected our actual journey – the good times, the tough patches, all of it. I literally just sat down with a cup of tea one afternoon and started jotting down memories and feelings. It took a few tries to get them sounding right, not too cheesy, you know?
What did we wear? Nothing fancy or new. I wore a dress I already had that I loved and felt good in. My husband just wore a smart shirt and trousers. The kids wore their slightly-less-scruffy outfits, which was cute. Comfort was definitely the priority. And rings? We talked about getting new ones, but honestly, we’re still attached to our original wedding bands. So, we just had them cleaned up really well, and during the little ceremony, we sort of re-exchanged them. It was a simple thing, but it felt really meaningful.
The day itself was pretty chilled. We spent the morning decorating the backyard a little – some fairy lights, a few flowers from the garden. My friend came over, a bit nervous but mostly excited. And then, reading our new vows to each other, with our kids and parents there… it was emotional. Way more emotional than I’d prepared for, actually. There were definitely a few happy tears, from me and a few others!
After our little backyard thing, we all went out to our favorite local restaurant. Just a nice, relaxed family dinner. Good food, good company, no stress. It was the perfect way to round it off.
So, was it worth it? Absolutely. One hundred percent. It wasn’t about putting on a performance or anything. It was a genuine moment for us to reconnect, to say those important things out loud again, and to appreciate how far we’ve come. It really did feel like hitting a refresh button on our marriage. If you’re thinking about doing it, I’d say go for it. Make it totally your own – big or small, fancy or simple. It’s the meaning you put into it that really counts, right?
