Alright, buckle up buttercups, ’cause I’m about to spill the tea on my little “what do men like” experiment. Now, before you clutch your pearls, I ain’t talking about some crazy dating guru stuff. This was pure, unadulterated observation and a teensy bit of harmless meddling.
So, it all started when I was scrolling through TikTok (as one does), and I kept seeing these videos about “what women want” and “how to attract the opposite sex.” It got me thinking – are these things actually true? Or is it all just a load of internet fluff?
I decided to put some theories to the test. My target group? My unsuspecting group of male friends. Bless their oblivious hearts.
Phase 1: The Compliment Blitz
- First, I started dropping more compliments. Not cheesy, over-the-top stuff, but genuine observations. “Hey, that shirt looks great on you,” or “That’s a really interesting point you made.”
- I watched. I noted. Did they puff up like peacocks? Nah. But they did seem a little more engaged in the conversation, a little more…perky? One friend, Mark, even started mansplaining less (a small victory, but a victory nonetheless!).
Phase 2: The Active Listener
- Next up: Active listening. I really focused on what they were saying, asked follow-up questions, and made eye contact. I nodded a lot. I even remembered details from previous conversations and brought them up later.
- The results? They opened up more. They shared more personal stuff. They seemed to appreciate being truly heard. It was actually kind of heartwarming. Like, I genuinely felt closer to them as friends.
Phase 3: The “I Need Your Help” Gambit
- Okay, this one felt a little manipulative, but hear me out. I asked for their help with something – small stuff, like “Hey, can you help me pick out a new phone case?” or “I’m trying to fix this thing, but I’m stuck. Any ideas?”
- The key here was to make them feel useful and competent. Men like to feel like they’re solving problems. It’s in their DNA or something. And guess what? It worked! They jumped at the chance to help, and they seemed genuinely pleased when they did.
The Big Reveal (Sort Of)
I didn’t straight-up tell them I was running some weird social experiment. That would be awkward. But after a few weeks, I did casually mention that I’d been reading about communication styles and wanted to try out some new things.
Their reaction? Mostly shrugs and “Okay, cool.” But I did notice that they continued to be a little more attentive and engaged even after I stopped actively “experimenting.”
The Takeaway
So, what did I learn? Well, men aren’t some mystical, unknowable creatures. They’re just people. And like most people, they appreciate:
- Genuine compliments
- Being listened to
- Feeling useful
No earth-shattering revelations here, but it was a fun little exercise. And honestly, it made me a better friend. I’m actively trying to be more present, more attentive, and more appreciative of the people in my life – regardless of gender.
Now, I’m off to try to figure out “what do cats really want?” Wish me luck.
