Alright, let’s talk about this whole sexting thing with men. It’s something I kinda fell into over the years, not like I woke up one day and decided, “Today, I become a master sexter!” It happened more organically, sometimes out of curiosity, sometimes because of distance in a relationship, sometimes just… boredom, maybe?
Getting Started
I remember the first few times I tried it. Felt super awkward. Typing things out, trying to sound sexy? Man, it’s harder than it looks. You type something, delete it, type something else, worry if it sounds dumb or desperate. Early days, I definitely sent some messages that probably made guys cringe or just scratch their heads.
I mostly used regular texting or messaging apps we were already talking on. Didn’t really go for specific “sexting apps” much, felt a bit forced to me. It usually started slow, maybe some flirty messages back and forth. Then someone, maybe me, maybe him, would push it a bit further. Send something a bit more suggestive. See how the other person reacted. If they played along, cool. If not, you just back off and pretend it didn’t happen, haha.
The Process and What I Noticed
So, I kept doing it here and there. Different guys, different situations. And you start noticing patterns, you know?
- The Enthusiast: Some guys were immediately all in. Like, zero to sixty. They loved it, matched the energy, sometimes even took it further than I expected. That could be fun, intense even.
- The Photo Collector: Then you had the guys who weren’t really into the texting part. They just wanted pictures. The conversation would dry up quick if you didn’t send any. Felt very transactional, not really my thing most of the time.
- The Awkward One: Sometimes, the guy was just as awkward about it as I was initially. Lots of emojis, short replies. Kinda killed the mood, to be honest.
- The Ghost: And yeah, sometimes you’d get into it, things seemed hot, and then… poof. Guy disappears. No explanation. That always sucked.
I found it was way, way better if there was already some kind of connection or chemistry before the sexting started. Trying to build intimacy purely through dirty texts with a stranger? Usually felt hollow. It could create this illusion of closeness, but often it didn’t translate into anything real offline. It was like building a house on sand.
Did it help in actual relationships? Yeah, sometimes. Especially in long-distance situations, it was a way to keep that spark alive, feel connected despite the miles. Even when living together, sending a naughty text during the day could build anticipation for later. That actually worked pretty well, felt more like playful flirting with someone you already care about.
Where I Landed
Over time, I experimented less. I learned what I liked and what felt weird or empty. Sending pics? Rarely felt comfortable with that unless I really, really trusted the person. The risk felt too high, and honestly, the words could be hotter anyway if done right.
So, now? I don’t really initiate sexting much just for the hell of it. If I’m talking to a guy and we have good chemistry, and the conversation naturally goes that way? Sure, I might lean into it. It can be a fun part of flirting and building intimacy. But I don’t see it as a goal in itself anymore. It’s just one small tool in the communication toolbox, not the whole damn set.
For me, the real connection, the face-to-face stuff, the shared experiences – that’s what matters. Sexting can be a fun little add-on sometimes, but I wouldn’t build anything serious just on that foundation. Been there, done that, learned it often just leads to digital dead ends.
