Okay, folks, let’s dive into this whole “stop dominating my husband” thing. It’s been a journey, let me tell you.
It all started a few months back. I noticed I was, well, kind of running the show. All the time. Like, I was making all the decisions, big and small. Where we eat, what we watch, even how we spend our weekends. It wasn’t intentional, it just… happened.
My husband, bless his heart, he’s a pretty laid-back guy. He rarely complains. But I started to feel like I was steamrolling him. Like his opinions weren’t even registering. That’s not a good feeling, not in a partnership.
My Wake-Up Call
It really hit me one night when we were planning a vacation. I had this whole elaborate itinerary mapped out, down to the minute. He just kind of nodded along. I asked him, “Are you even excited about this?” And he gave me this look, like, “Sure, whatever you want.” Ouch.
Taking Action (and Messing Up a Bit)
So, I decided to change things. First, I tried to just… stop. Like, completely back off. But that was weird. We ended up eating cereal for dinner three nights in a row because neither of us made a decision. It was like going from 100 to 0.
Then, I tried to force him to make decisions. “You pick! No, I insist!” That just made him uncomfortable. It felt like I was putting him on the spot.
Finding the Balance
Finally, after a lot of trial and error, I figured out a better approach. It’s about consciously creating space for his input. Small steps to help my husband.
- I started asking open-ended questions. Instead of “Do you want pizza?” I’d ask, “What kind of food are you in the mood for?”
- I started actively listening. Like, really listening, not just waiting for my turn to talk.
- I learned to let go of the small stuff. So what if he loads the dishwasher “wrong”? It still gets done.
- I started to pause before making a decision, giving him a chance to jump in.
- I began thanking him for when he does make the decision.
The Results
It’s been a gradual process, but things are definitely better. He’s more engaged, more vocal. We’re making decisions together. It feels like a real partnership again. I feel not having all that pressure only on me. And honestly, I think he’s happier too. We both are!
It’s not perfect, of course. I still catch myself slipping into old habits sometimes. But now, I’m aware of it. And I’m working on it. It’s a continuous process, this whole relationship thing. But it’s worth it.
