You wanna know how to make a sex toy? Well, I heard people talkin’ ’bout it. It’s a thing, I guess. People gettin’ all creative and such. I don’t know much about such things, but I’ll tell you what I heard.
First, you gotta think about what you want. Some folks like the pokin’ kind, some like the buzzy kind. I don’t judge. Just sayin’, there’s different strokes for different folks, you know? Homemade sex toy is a popular word I hear, sounds like folks are tryin’ to save a buck. Good for them, I say.
Now, if you want somethin’ to poke with, I heard you gotta be careful. Don’t go stickin’ just anything up there. You could hurt yourself real bad. I heard some folks use, well, things from the kitchen. Like a butter knife. Not for pokin’, mind you, but for, uh, warmin’ things up. I don’t know the details, but that’s what I heard. Sounds dangerous to me. Best thing is to make sure it’s clean. Gotta keep things clean, you know? Dirty things can make you sick.
- Clean it good, whatever you use.
- Don’t use nothin’ sharp.
- Be careful, don’t hurt yourself.
Then there’s the buzzy kind. Now, I ain’t never used one of them, but I hear they’re popular. How to make a sex toy that buzzes? Well, I reckon you need somethin’ that wiggles. Like one of them electric toothbrushes, maybe? I don’t know if that’s safe, though. Electricity and, well, you know… it just don’t seem right. Maybe wrap it in somethin’ soft? A sock, maybe? I don’t know. Just a thought.
Some fellas, they want somethin’ different. I heard them talkin’ ’bout a homemade pussy toy. What do I know about a pussy toy? Not much. But I heard you can make it at home with stuff you have. I guess you need somethin’ soft and, well, hole-y. I seen some use a, a rolled-up sock? Or maybe a sponge? I heard one fella talk about using a, a rubber glove. Just make sure you clean and safe. That’s important. Don’t want no little pieces comin’ off inside you. That would be a mess.
Some folks, they like them big toys. I heard ’em sayin’, “sex toys are your friends”. Big or small, I don’t think it matters much. Just as long as you’re havin’ fun and bein’ safe. That’s the important part. And don’t be ashamed neither. Everyone’s got their own likes and dislikes. What is a sex toy? I guess it’s somethin’ to make you happy. Nothin’ wrong with that, I reckon.
I saw somethin’ the other day about makin’ little animals outta yarn. Crochet, they call it. One was a little elephant, all cute and cuddly. Mini Love Elephant Amigurumi, they called it. Now, I don’t know what that has to do with, you know, but maybe some folks like to have a little friend with ’em. I don’t know. Just sayin’, it takes all kinds.
And then there’s this place, Inn by the Sea. Sounds fancy. They got somethin’ called Sea Glass. I don’t know what that is but they got a four course meal. Sounds good to me, but I can’t see what that has to do with… unless they give you a sex toy to eat with. Ha! Just kidding.
Anyways, that’s all I know about how to make a sex toy. I heard things, you know? Don’t use nothin’ that will hurt you. And always, always, clean it good. You don’t want to get sick. And be safe. That’s the most important thing. Don’t go doin’ nothin’ crazy. Just be smart and have some fun. And if you don’t know what you’re doin’, maybe just ask someone who does. Or go buy one. They sell ’em in stores now, you know. Right out in the open. Times are changin’, that’s for sure.
Oh, and one more thing. Don’t be puttin’ no food up there. I heard about that too. Vegetables and such. That’s just not right. Food is for eatin’, not for… well, you know. Just use some common sense, folks. That’s all I’m sayin’. Common sense goes a long way, especially when you’re talkin’ about how to make a sex toy. You just gotta be smart about it, that’s all. And have fun, don’t forget to have fun.
