Alright, let’s talk about this whole thing. People get weirdly technical sometimes, like it’s building IKEA furniture. Spoilers: it’s not.
I remember this one time, years ago, felt like ages. There was this guy, real sweet, but kinda clueless? Not in a bad way, just… dense. We were trying to figure things out, you know, the whole relationship dance. And there’s always this pressure, unspoken stuff mostly, about what you’re supposed to do or like.
Expectations vs Reality
See, the thing is, everyone’s different. What works for one person is just… awkward for another. Like trying to follow a recipe someone else wrote down drunk. You think you’re doing it right, step-by-step, but the result is just messy.
We had this evening, supposed to be chill, movie night or whatever. And there was this vibe, this expectation hanging in the air. You could feel it. He wasn’t saying anything, I wasn’t saying anything, but it was just there. Like that time I worked on that awful group project back in college. Everyone knew the deadline was coming, everyone had their own idea of how to do it, but nobody actually communicated until the last minute. Total disaster.
- You gotta actually talk. Seriously. Sounds basic, right? But people forget.
- Pay attention. Not just to the obvious stuff, but the little things. Are they tense? Relaxed? Breathing weird?
- It’s not a performance. Or shouldn’t be. If it feels like one, something’s off.
We ended up just… talking that night. Cleared the air. Way better than trying to guess or follow some imaginary script. It wasn’t about hitting certain points or techniques grabbed from some dodgy corner of the internet. It was just about being there, paying attention, and making sure everyone felt, you know, good and comfortable.
It’s like cooking. You can follow a recipe exactly, but if you don’t taste as you go, or adjust the heat, or just understand the ingredients you’re working with, it’s probably gonna turn out bland. Or burnt. Same difference, really. Just gotta be present and communicate. That’s the long and short of it from my book.
