So last Tuesday started off like any other day—woke up feeling like I’d barely slept, tripped over the dog bowl, and discovered my kid used my favorite mug for crayon soup. Surprise surprise, I was already riding the Hot Mess Express before 7 AM. Here’s exactly how I clawed my way back from chaos-town.
Step 1: Admit I’m Not Driving This Train
My usual move? Pretend everything’s fine until I snap at the neighbor’s perfectly trimmed hedges. This time? Grabbed my ratty journal and scribbled: “Today’s a dumpster fire. 10/10 stress level.” Didn’t sugarcoat it. Just stared at that ugly truth.
Step 2: Do the Weird Emergency Brake Thing
Had three back-to-back Zooms looming. Instead of “powering through,” I:
- Locked myself in the bathroom for 90 seconds (kiddo banged on the door yelling about waffles—classic)
- Stuck my whole face in a bowl of ice water—GASPED like a cartoon character
- Whisper-yelled “NOT TODAY SATAN” at the mirror. Twice.
Felt stupid. But… heart stopped trying to break outta my ribs.
Step 3: Hunt Tiny Wins Like Discount Treasure
Stress had me seeing disaster confetti everywhere. So I:
- Picked one sock off the floor (didn’t fold it—just yeeted it near the hamper)
- Ate two bites of cold pizza instead of stress-skipping lunch
- Texted my buddy: “Alive. Barely.” Got back: “Same. High five from hell.” Snorted. Progress.
Step 4: Smash the Perfection Glasses
Dinner was eggs dumped on leftover noodles (called it “fusion cuisine”). Kid cried because eggs touched green beans. Instead of my usual “nice mom” script? Said: “Yeah this sucks. Wanna watch terrible cartoons?” We ate lukewarm nonsense while SpongeBob screamed. Zero guilt.
Why Any Of This Mattered
Next morning? Woke up feeling… lighter. Still messy—dog was chewing a flip-flop—but that crushing “I CAN’T” fog lifted. Realized surviving the Hot Mess Express isn’t about fixing everything; it’s about throwing yourself a dang life raft while sinking. Grab the ice water. Burn the eggs. Wave at chaos passing by.
Still stressed? Oh hell yes. But today? I’m riding this train instead of getting dragged under it.
