This thing, this fighting thing, when is it okay? I tell you, my head hurts when I think about it. When is it okay to get into an altercation, you ask? Well, let me tell you, it ain’t that simple.
When is it Okay to Fight?
Sometimes, you get so mad, so riled up. Like a pot boiling over, that’s how it feels. You feel anger, real strong, and you just want to shout or… or worse. They say anger is like a fire, it can keep you warm, or it can burn your house down. This anger thing, it’s there for a reason. They say it’s there to protect us. Like when a dog barks at a stranger, that’s anger protecting its home.
You get angry when someone tries to take advantage. When someone is mean, or doesn’t listen, or just plain rude. Anger comes up like a storm. Some folks, they get angry when things ain’t fair. Like when the neighbor’s rooster keeps crowing all night, and you can’t sleep. Or when someone cuts in line at the market, just like that, no respect. That makes you mad.
- When someone is threatening you, like really making you scared.
- When someone tries to take what’s yours, your land, your money, your dignity.
- When someone is hurting someone you love, a child, an old person.
But, being angry, it ain’t always a good thing. It’s like a wild horse, you gotta learn to ride it, or it’ll throw you off. When you lose your temper, oh boy, that’s when trouble starts. You might say things, bad things, things you’ll regret later, like a bitter taste in your mouth. When is it okay to get into an altercation? Not when you lose your temper, that’s for sure.
Dealing with Anger
This anger, it can lead to bad things. I’ve seen it. Fights, yelling, hurt feelings. It’s like a sickness, it can spread. One person gets mad, then another, and another, and pretty soon, everyone’s shouting. They say you should talk, use your words. Tell people you’re angry, and why. But talk slow, like you’re counting your words. And say “I,” like “I feel angry,” not “You make me angry.” It’s about you, not them. I think a normal person, they wouldn’t go around punching and kicking. No, that ain’t right. Someone doing that, they need help. Like a doctor, but for their anger.
How to Cool Down
They say there are ways to cool down. Like when you’re baking bread, you gotta let it rest. Same with anger, you gotta let it rest. Breathe deep, they say. Like you’re blowing out candles, slow and steady. Or think of something nice, like a field of flowers, or a calm river. Or say a word, over and over, like “easy” or “calm.” Some folks, they listen to music, that helps too. When you feel that anger coming up, like a storm, you gotta do these things, these cooling things. If you are calm you think better. You don’t want to get into a fight, especially a street fight. Being calm in those situations is good. It will help you.
Here are some other things you can try when you feel anger coming on:
- Count to ten, real slow, before you say anything.
- Go for a walk, get some fresh air.
- Talk to someone you trust, someone who can help you calm down.
- Do something you enjoy, like gardening or listening to the birds sing.
When is it ok to get into an altercation? When is it okay to have a passionate dispute? When that anger gets too strong, you might do things you regret. Say mean words, hurt someone, or feel bad about yourself later. You need to control this anger. I seen folks get angry over little things. A bad word, a look, a small thing. They get so worked up. They worry about things at home, or work, or just about anything. This anger it is like a fire, you need to learn how to control it.
Anger, it ain’t always bad, but it ain’t always good either. When is it okay to get into an altercation? Maybe when someone is really hurting you, or someone you love. But even then, you gotta be careful. You gotta think before you act. This anger, it’s a powerful thing. It can make you do things you wouldn’t normally do. You gotta learn to control it, or it’ll control you.
