Alright, let’s talk about this whole ‘gender roles’ thing. It’s something I’ve bumped up against pretty much my whole life, and honestly, thinking back on it just makes me shake my head sometimes.
I didn’t start out thinking critically about it, you know? It was just… the way things were. Growing up, I saw it all the time. Dads did certain things, moms did other things. Boys played with trucks, girls played with dolls. Nobody really questioned it, least of all me. I just kinda went along with it. I remember wanting to try something that was supposedly a ‘girl thing’ – I think it was cooking class or something – and getting some weird looks. Didn’t stop me, but it made me pause, made me think, “Huh, why is this weird?”
Then, as I got older, I started really watching people. I saw friends, both guys and girls, getting steered away from stuff they were genuinely interested in. I had a buddy who was amazing with kids, really patient and nurturing, but he felt super awkward about wanting to be a kindergarten teacher because, well, “that’s a woman’s job,” right? What a load of crap. He ended up doing something he didn’t really love, and I always wondered what could have been.
And it wasn’t just about jobs or hobbies. It seeped into everything:
- How you were expected to act in relationships.
- What emotions were okay to show (or hide).
- Even stupid stuff like what colors you should like.
I started realizing these weren’t just harmless traditions; they were like invisible fences, keeping people penned in. It forces folks into molds that just don’t fit. You end up with guys who are scared to show vulnerability or girls who feel pressured to put everyone else’s needs before their own, even when it hurts them.
My Own Little Experiments
So, I started pushing back, just in small ways in my own life. I made a point of learning skills that weren’t ‘typical’ for my gender. I encouraged my kids, when they came along, to try absolutely anything that caught their eye, didn’t matter if it was ‘for boys’ or ‘for girls’. We had dolls and diggers living side-by-side, and guess what? The world didn’t end. My son learned to sew on a button, my daughter learned how to change a tire. Simple stuff, maybe, but it felt important.
What I found was, when you ignore those silly ‘rules’, people are just… happier. More themselves. They get to explore all the different parts of who they are. Sure, sometimes people look at you funny, but mostly, it just works out better for everyone involved.
So, why are gender roles bad? From what I’ve seen and lived through, it’s because they limit us. They put unnecessary pressure on people. They stop talented individuals from doing what they’re good at. They create misunderstandings and frustrations. They just make life harder and less interesting than it needs to be. Getting rid of those expectations? That felt like taking off a pair of shoes that were way too tight. It just lets everyone breathe a bit easier.
