How I Farted Up My Relationship & Fixed Stuff
So look, I used to be that guy. Thought I knew it all in relationships. Spoiler alert: I was dead wrong. Did dumb stuff like clockwork until Sarah almost walked out. Here’s exactly how I screwed up & crawled back.
First off, I had ZERO chill. Like ZERO. Sarah’d go out with her girls? I’d blow up her phone. “Where u at?” “Who’s there?” “Send pics??” Pure crazy pants stuff. One night she muted me mid-rant. Felt like an idiot staring at my own texts.
Then there was the silent treatment. Ohhh boy. If she forgot our anniversary? I’d stew for three days straight. Slam cabinets. Mumble crap under my breath. Made our apartment feel like a morgue. Guess what? She just booked weekend trips instead of dealing with my sulking.
Top-tier dumb stuff:
- Criticized her driving constantly (“Brake sooner!” “Watch that car!” Like her damn GPS)
- Invited her parents over without asking
- Asked if she gained weight after her gym session
Yeah. I’m surprised she didn’t yeet my PlayStation out the window.
My wake-up call? Her suitcase on the bed. “Staying at Lisa’s.” Didn’t yell. Just looked tired. Said: “Can’t walk on eggshells anymore.” Gut punch moment.
Fix it time. No guru crap. Real action:
Grabbed a notebook. Wrote down EVERY fight we had last month. All started by me. Highlighted my goofs in yellow freakin’ marker. Felt awful seeing it all laid out.
Stopped assuming crap. Literally made myself say “Is now a good time?” before venting about work. Asked before rearranging her kitchen junk. Even texted “Wanna grab tacos Thursday?” instead of demanding date night.
Took the ego down ten pegs. Apologized FOR REAL. Not “sorry but you annoyed me first.” Said: “I messed up criticizing your dinner. You worked hard. I’m a jerk.” Added specific action: “Next time I’ll help chop veggies instead.”
Did stuff WITHOUT tracking points. Saw laundry overflowing? Did a load. Not for brownie points. Just did it. Made coffee for her on my early shift days. Left a mug by the Keurig.
The big guns? Therapy. Confessed I used sulking as weapon. Therapist roasted me: “You want a medal for communicating like a toddler?” Ouch. But right.
Started actually hearing Sarah. When she said “Just need quiet time,” I stopped barging in with gossip. Sat in silence scrolling stupid memes. World didn’t end.
Notice progress took weeks. Small victories. Didn’t interrogate her girls’ night out ✅. Finally discussed chores without exploding ✅. Saw her smile reach her eyes again.
Still mess up? Heck yeah. Old habits creep back. Difference? Now I catch myself & laugh: “Whoops. Being annoying again. My bad.” And we keep moving.
Simple? No. Easy? Nope. Worth crawling through broken glass? Every damn second.
