Alright so last weekend I’m sipping hot cocoa scrolling through holiday memes when this silly idea pops up. What if I tried those overly cute Christmas pickup lines? Like the ones people cringe at but secretly find adorable? Figured why not test ‘em myself – could be fun for my blog. Grabbed my notebook and phone ready to embarrass myself.

The Whole Research Thing
First up, gotta dig up the cheesiest stuff possible. Spent hours on random forums, mom blogs you name it. Saw so many variations like reindeer names Santa wishes cookie jokes etc. Way too many about mistletoe honestly. Wanted ones that sound flirty but not creepy. Filtered out the real clangers stuff like “you sit on my lap” yeah hard pass. Ended up with three categories:
- Santa & Sleigh Stuff
- Cookie & Sweet Treat Jokes
- Mistletoe & Lights Stuff
Classic Christmas cheese you know?
The Actual Testing… Oh Boy
Saved my favorites then picked like ten people off my contacts. Friends coworkers that cute barista dude text buddies… anybody I knew wouldn’t freak. Started typing feeling kinda silly honestly.
Sent the Santa ones first like “Is your name Rudolph? Cuz you’re guiding my sleigh tonight.” Hit send sweating a little already. Got back mostly laughing emojis or “Lol really?” One person dead serious said “My name is Sarah.” Ouch rough start.
Cookie ones were a bit smoother like “Are you Santa’s list? Cuz I wanna check you twice.” Responses warmer here a few actual giggles even one “Haha smooth!” Felt like a total tool but hey it’s working!

Saved the mistletoe for last. Sent “If I told you you look good under lights would you hold some mistletoe above me?” Held my breath… then buzz. Reply: “Only if you bring cookies too lol.” SUCCESS! Sorta. Fist pump moment for sure.
What Actually Happened
Okay so results were super mixed.
- About half the folks totally ignored me radio silence. Ouch again but expected it.
- A few sent back jokes way worse than mine so fun banter!
- Two actually flirted back properly we might get coffee soon!
- The rest thought I lost my mind or got hacked!
Big takeaway? Super cornball lines need the right moment & person. Don’t text cold. Try face-to-face maybe with twinkly lights around way better vibe. Felt awkward tapping them out dry on my kitchen stool.
Overall though glad I did it. Total cringe fest but kind of fun. Just… maybe save these lines for someone who already likes your goofy side. Lesson learned: Christmas cheese needs timing.