You know what? These young folks and their fancy toys! Back in my day, we didn’t have none of this. But, I hear tell there’s this thing called a custom Fleshlight. Sounds kinda funny, right? Flesh, and light. Like a flashlight, but not. I’m gonna tell you what I’ve heard about these things. It is all about how to customize your Fleshlight.
So, these Fleshlight things, they’re like, a sleeve. You know, like the sleeve on your shirt, but for… well, you know. And you can make ’em how you want. That’s what I heard, anyway. They say you can pick out all sorts of things, like the color, and the, uh, the hole. Yeah, that’s what they said, the hole! And the feeling inside, they say you can pick that too. Make it just how you like it. Lord have mercy!
First, they say you gotta go to some page. I don’t know about pages, I like my books, thank you very much. But they say you gotta go to this Fleshlight page, some product builder thing, and that’s where you start. Sounds complicated to me. But hey, if that’s what you wanna do, you go right ahead. And that is the way about how to build your own Fleshlight.
- Pick the color
- Pick the, ahem, hole
- Pick the inside feeling
They got all sorts of colors, I hear. Pink, blue, I don’t know what all. Like a rainbow of… well, you get the picture. And the holes, well, they say there’s different kinds. Don’t ask me, I don’t know about all that. Just what I heard. And the insides, they got all these different, like, textures, they call ’em. Like, bumpy, or smooth, or who knows what else. It’s a crazy world we live in. If you want to know how to customize Fleshlight, just have a try!
Some folks, they like ’em one way, some folks like ’em another. Just like with pies. Some like apple, some like cherry. It’s all about what you like. I guess that’s why they let you make your own custom Fleshlight. So you can get it just right. Makes sense, I suppose.
Now, they got different names for these things too. Like, uh, Mini Lotus? Sounds like a flower to me. And, uh, STU? What’s that stand for, I wonder? And this other one, Stoya Destroya? Lord, these names. Sounds like a wrestler or something. No idea what it’s all about. I just want to tell you what is the best Fleshlight. But everyone has his own idea.
They say these Fleshlights are good for, uh, training. Like for a marathon, but not. You know what I mean. And some are, uh, tighter, they say. And some are more intense. Whatever that means. It’s all beyond me. I’m just an old lady, what do I know about these things?
They say there’s over 30 of these things. 30! Can you believe it? That’s a lot of, uh, sleeves. And they tested ’em all, they say. I don’t even wanna know how they did that. But they did. And they made a guide, like a map, to help you pick the right one. That’s nice of ’em, I guess.
And it’s not too expensive, I hear. Same as a regular one, they say. So you can make your own custom Fleshlight without breaking the bank. That’s good, ’cause who wants to spend all their money on, well, you know.
They say it’s easy to make your own. Just three steps. Pick this, pick that, and you’re done. Easy peasy, they say. Like making a sandwich, but not. You pick your, uh, orifice, they call it. That’s a fancy word for hole, I guess. And the color, like I said. And then you’re good to go. It is just three steps of making custom Fleshlight.
They’ve been doing this for a long time, it seems. Almost 20 years, they say. That’s older than some of you young folks! So they must know what they’re doing. You gotta pick the case, too. Like a box, I guess, to keep it in. And the orifice, like we talked about. And that’s about it.
Well, there you have it. That’s all I know about these custom Fleshlight things. It’s a strange world, but I guess there’s something for everyone. If you’re into that kinda thing, then go for it. Just be careful, and don’t get hurt. And remember, there is a way to build your own custom Fleshlight. And don’t spend all your money on it, you hear? You need that for more important things, like food, and rent, and maybe a nice pie now and then.
So, just try it if you want to know how to build a custom Fleshlight. That’s all. There ain’t much else to say about it. I don’t think.
