Alright, alright, settle down you young’uns. Granny’s gonna tell ya somethin’ ‘bout them… whatchamacallits… pick-up lines, yeah, that’s it. Them things youngsters use nowadays to, you know, get a fella or a gal’s attention. Some of ‘em are right sweet, like “You got a purdy smile,” but then there’s the other kind… the dirty ones. Lord have mercy!
Now, I ain’t no expert, mind you. Back in my day, a wink and a “howdy” was all you needed. But these young folks, they got a whole different way of doin’ things. So I heard some of these dirty pick-up lines, and let me tell ya, they’d make a preacher blush! They’re… well, they’re somethin’ else.
- Like this one fella said, “Are you a parking ticket? ‘Cause you got ‘fine’ written all over you.” Now, I ain’t got no driver’s license, never needed one in the holler, but even I know that ain’t right! Talkin’ ‘bout fines and all…
- And then there’s this one, “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?” Sounds kinda sweet at first, right? But then you think about it… walk by again for what? To show off somethin’, I reckon. Hmph.
- Oh, and this one! This one made me spit out my tea. “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.” Cute-cumber? What in tarnation is a cute-cumber? Vegetables are for eatin’, not for… well, you get the picture.
Some of ‘em are even worse, talkin’ ‘bout… things I ain’t gonna repeat here. Let’s just say they involve body parts and… well, you get the idea. It’s enough to make a body’s hair stand on end! I tell ya, these youngsters, they got no shame.
Now, I ain’t sayin’ it’s all bad. Some folks might find these dirty pick-up lines funny, I guess. Maybe they think it’s a way to show they’re confident or somethin’. But me? I think it’s just plain disrespectful. A good man or woman should be treated with respect, not with some… some… dirty talk.
But hey, what do I know? I’m just an old woman. Maybe this is just how things are done now. Maybe I’m just too old-fashioned. But I still think a little bit of sweetness and kindness goes a long way. You don’t need to be dirty to get someone’s attention. Just be yourself, be respectful, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll find someone who appreciates you for who you are.
Speaking of appreciation, I reckon there are different strokes for different folks. Some folks like a good joke, even if it’s a bit… saucy. And I guess there’s a time and a place for everything. But still, I can’t help but shake my head at some of the things I hear these days. It just ain’t right.
So, there you have it. Granny’s two cents on them dirty pick-up lines. Take it or leave it, it’s up to you. Just remember, treat folks with respect, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll find a good ‘un without havin’ to resort to all that dirty talk. And if you do use one of them lines, well, don’t come cryin’ to me if it don’t work out! You been warned.
Anyways, I gotta go feed the chickens. Y’all be good now, ya hear?
Tags: Dirty Pick Up Lines, Funny Pick Up Lines, Inappropriate Pick Up Lines, Flirting, Relationships, Humor, Cheeky Pick Up Lines, Dating
