Today, I wanna talk about something we all go through in relationships – those tricky little problems that pop up, no matter how much you care about each other. I’ve had my fair share of these, and let me tell you, it’s never a walk in the park.
It all started with me and my partner, a few years back. Things were great, all lovey-dovey and smooth. But then, little things started to creep in. Like, I’m a neat freak, and they’re, well, not so much. I like the toilet seat down, they always leave it up. Small stuff, right? But it started to bug me. We began having these little arguments, nothing major, but the vibe was off.
Then came the silent treatment. We started to be more close off, less affectionate, we are no longer sharing our little thoughts, which is a signal of distancing. And I was like, “What’s going on here?” We were talking less and less, and when we did, it felt forced. It was like walking on eggshells. I remember thinking, “Is this it? Are we losing our spark?” It was a scary thought.
I decided we needed to do something. So, I initiated a heart-to-heart talk. I told them how I was feeling, how I noticed the distance, and how much I missed our closeness. It wasn’t easy, I stumbled over my words, and it got a bit emotional. But I had to get it out there. And they listened. They shared their side too, how they felt overwhelmed with work and how they didn’t realize they were pulling away. We realized that we were getting triggered by old habits and past experiences that had nothing to do with each other.
What We Did
- Opened Up: We started talking more, really talking. Not just about our day, but about our feelings, our fears, and our dreams.
- Listened: We made an effort to really listen to each other, without interrupting or judging.
- Made Time: We set aside time for each other, no matter how busy we were. Even if it was just a quick coffee date or a walk in the park.
- Took Responsibility: When things got heated, we tried to own up to our part in it. I admitted when I was being too controlling, and they acknowledged when they were being distant.
It wasn’t a quick fix. It took time, effort, and a lot of patience. But slowly, we started to reconnect. We found our way back to each other. We learned to communicate better, to understand each other’s triggers, and to navigate our differences. It’s still a work in progress, but we’re committed to it.
So, if you’re going through something similar, don’t lose hope. Relationships have their ups and downs. It’s how you handle the downs that really matters. Talk to each other, listen, and be willing to put in the work. It’s worth it.
