So I woke up thinking about that old Alice in Wonderland movie again. Kept picturing the rabbit hole and that smiling cat. Weird, right? But I kept seeing folks online whisper about how it’s linked to schizophrenia somehow. Wanted to figure that out, made some coffee, and decided to tackle it my own way today. Started messy, ended messy, but here’s how it went down.
Way 1: Trying To See That Twisty Nonsense Logic
My first thought was simple: maybe Alice sees the world all mixed up, so I tried to fake that feeling. Sat down on my sofa after lunch, stared at the ceiling fan spinning. Told myself, “Okay, that fan isn’t just blowing air. It’s telling secrets. Swirling whispers.”
Felt silly after five seconds. Didn’t work.
Tried harder. Went outside, looked at a perfectly normal tree. Focused real hard, saying stuff like, “That branch moving isn’t the wind. It’s waving specifically at me. Warning me.” Sounded stupid in my head. Honestly, just got a headache. Couldn’t force my brain to twist things like that for more than a minute. My brain just said “Nope, it’s just a tree.” Epic fail. Way harder than it sounds.
Way 2: Making Stuff Up Like The Hatter’s Mad Tea Party
Okay, scratch the first way. Plan B: the nonsense talk. Thought I could imitate the Mad Hatter’s vibe. How hard could babbling be?
Grabbed my dog, Bruno. He just looked confused. Held up his chew toy like a microphone. Started rapid-fire: “Bruno! Why is time skipping like a broken toaster? Does bacon fly south for crackers? Is my coffee plotting?” Bruno tilted his head. I felt like an idiot. My sentences kept crashing. Couldn’t keep the random nonsense flowing without stumbling over real words trying to make sense. It wasn’t confusingly deep, just confusingly dumb. Totally tanked trying to sound like controlled chaos. My brain kept trying to fix it.
Way 3: Feeling Lost Like After The Rabbit
Strike two. Last shot: that deep-down feeling of being utterly, completely lost and scared. Like Alice tumbling down the hole or shrinking unexpectedly. How do you fake that?
Sat on my floor in the dark for this one. Lights off. Curtains closed. Quiet.
Tried remembering a time I felt truly panicked and unsure. Heart pounding, sweat kinda feeling. Focused real hard on uncertainty: “What if everything feels wrong? What if up isn’t up? Did I forget something huge? Am I safe here, right now?”
Got kinda tense. Legit started feeling a bit shaky after a few minutes. Mind went blank, fuzzy sort of panic. That “lost” feeling started poking through. Way easier than the others. Stopped after ten minutes because it wasn’t fun. It was uncomfortable. Felt drained, not enlightened. Maybe touched a tiny, tiny sliver of something scary. Didn’t want to sit there any longer.
So, What The Heck Did I Learn?
This whole experiment? Kinda felt pointless and weird. Maybe that is the point?
- Twisting Reality: Forcing my brain to misinterpret stuff felt impossible and fake.
- The Nonsense Talk: Trying to sound randomly profound just made me sound ridiculous. My mind fought back.
- The Deep Lost Feeling: That one… actually kinda worked. Too well. Unpleasant. Not something to dwell on.
Maybe those whispers about Alice and schizophrenia are just folks trying to label that feeling of reality bending and being utterly lost and terrified. Today felt like wrestling with fog. Didn’t really “get” anything useful, just felt a bit disturbed by trying Way 3. Ended up just making coffee again, petting Bruno, and being glad my ceiling fan isn’t actually whispering secrets. Probably just a bunch of nonsense people read too much into. My brain hurts. Experiment over.
