So, About That Time I Dated Someone in the Adult Film Industry…
Yeah, someone asked me about this the other day, brings back memories. It happened. Wasn’t exactly like you see in movies, let me tell you. It started pretty normal, actually. Met her through a mutual friend at a party, not like I went looking for it. Didn’t even know what she did for a living for the first couple of weeks.
We just clicked, you know? Went out for drinks, dinner, watched stupid movies. Standard stuff. She was funny, smart, easy to talk to. Then she dropped the bomb about her job. Honestly, my first reaction was just… surprise. Like, “Oh. Okay.” Took me a minute to process that. Wasn’t disgust or excitement, more like trying to fit this new piece of information into the picture I already had of her.
What It Was Actually Like Day-to-Day
Things definitely changed after I knew. Not always in bad ways, but it added a layer of complexity you just don’t get in most relationships. Here’s some of the stuff I remember dealing with:
- The Scheduling: Her work hours were all over the place. Long days on set, sometimes traveling with little notice. Made planning anything a real pain. Spontaneous weekend trip? Forget about it half the time.
- The Public Thing: We couldn’t always just go anywhere. Got recognized a few times. Some fans were cool, others were… not. Really awkward trying to have a quiet dinner when someone’s staring or trying to take pictures. Made me pretty uncomfortable.
- My Own Head: Yeah, gotta be honest, it messed with my head sometimes. You try not to think about her work, but it’s there. You see stuff online, or she mentions a tough day on set. Trust became this huge thing we had to constantly work on. It wasn’t easy separating the job from the person, especially early on.
- Telling People (or Not): How do you introduce your girlfriend? “This is Sarah, she’s…” Yeah, right. Ended up being vague with most of my friends and family. Just easier than dealing with the questions and the judgment. Felt like hiding a part of our lives, which sucked.
It wasn’t all bad, obviously. We had good times. She was still the person I initially liked. We laughed a lot. But the job was always there, like a background noise you couldn’t turn off. It affected her mood, her energy levels, and yeah, how we interacted with the world as a couple. It wasn’t glamorous behind the scenes. Lots of stress, industry politics, dealing with weirdos online. Just a job, but a really, really weird one.
How It All Wrapped Up
In the end, it just didn’t work out. And honestly? The job was a big part of it, but not the only reason. The constant need for reassurance, the difficulty blending our social circles, the feeling of being in a spotlight I never asked for… it just wore us down. We had regular relationship problems too, stuff that probably would have been issues regardless of her career. But the job amplified everything, made the small cracks feel like huge canyons.
We broke up amicably enough. No big drama. Just kind of mutually realized it was too hard, taking too much of a toll on both of us. Looking back, it was an experience, that’s for sure. Learned a lot about judging people, about assumptions, about what goes on behind closed doors in industries we only see from the outside. But would I do it again? Probably not. Too much baggage, man. Too much noise.
