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How to use emotion coaching? Find out how to help your child in 3 simple steps.

Tan161130. by Tan161130.
January 14, 2025
in Emotional Relationships
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How to use emotion coaching? Find out how to help your child in 3 simple steps.
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Alright, so, I tried this thing called “emotion coaching.” It’s basically about helping your kids deal with their feelings. Sounds simple enough, right? Well, let me tell you, it was quite a journey.

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How to use emotion coaching? Find out how to help your child in 3 simple steps.

First, I started by just paying more attention to my own feelings. You know, like actually noticing when I was getting frustrated or annoyed. It was kind of weird at first, but I started recognizing my own emotional patterns. Then, I tried to do the same with my kids’ feelings. Like, when my little one was throwing a tantrum, instead of just getting mad, I paid more attention to what was happening.

Tuning In

It’s all about tuning in, they say. I tried to be more aware of what was going on with my kids emotionally. When my kid was upset about not getting a toy, I tried to see things from their perspective.

  • I started by really listening when they were talking, even if it was just about some silly game.
  • I tried to pick up on their non-verbal cues too, like their body language or facial expressions.

Putting Feelings into Words

Next, I worked on helping them put their feelings into words. This was a bit tricky, to be honest. Like, instead of saying “I’m mad,” we tried to be more specific. “I’m frustrated because I can’t get this puzzle piece to fit.” Or “I’m disappointed because we can’t go to the park today.” We started using a feelings chart, which helped a bit.

It was kind of awkward at first, like we were learning a new language. But eventually, it got easier. They started using these words more naturally, and it actually helped them calm down faster sometimes.

Setting Limits and Solving Problems

Then came the part about setting limits and helping them solve problems. This is where things got real. It’s easy to empathize when they’re sad, but what about when they’re hitting their sibling? I realized I had to be firm but understanding.

How to use emotion coaching? Find out how to help your child in 3 simple steps.

For example, when my older child was angry at their younger sibling, we worked on finding better ways to express that anger. Instead of yelling, we practiced taking deep breaths or going to another room to calm down. We also talked about how to solve the problem that made them angry in the first place. Lots of talking, let me tell you.

Honestly, it wasn’t a smooth process. There were times when I messed up, times when they messed up, and times when we were all just frustrated. But I kept at it, tried to be patient, and eventually, I started seeing some changes.

My kids started getting better at handling their emotions. They still had meltdowns, of course, but they were shorter and less intense. And they started talking about their feelings more, even the difficult ones. It was like they were learning how to navigate this whole messy world of emotions.

It’s still a work in progress, this emotion coaching thing. But I’m glad I tried it. It’s helped me connect with my kids on a deeper level, and I think it’s helping them grow into more emotionally intelligent people. And that’s pretty cool, if you ask me.

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