Okay, so, about this whole “Why won’t husbands try to save a marriage?” thing. It’s been bugging me, so I decided to dig into it. First off, I started by jotting down all the squabbles my husband and I have been having. Nothing fancy, just a list on my phone. It was kind of eye-opening to see it all laid out like that.
Then, I thought, “Why even bother trying to save this sinking ship?” I mean, walking away seemed so much easier at that point. But then I started thinking about all the good stuff, you know? The shared history, the inside jokes, the comfort of having someone who knows you inside and out. So, I made another list, this time of all the reasons to stay and fight for us.
Reaching Out
Next, I started reading up on marriage counseling stuff. I wasn’t ready to drag my husband to therapy just yet, but I figured it couldn’t hurt to learn a bit. There’s a ton of info out there about the “stages of a dying marriage.” Sounds dramatic, but it was actually pretty helpful. It made me realize we weren’t alone in this struggle.
After that, I stumbled upon some articles about how important it is to keep the spark alive and have actual conversations, not just about bills and chores. It sounds obvious, but we’d kind of lost that somewhere along the way. I made a mental note to work on that.
Taking Action
Then came the hard part: actually trying to fix things. I started by picking a fight, but a productive one. I used all that stuff I learned about expressing concerns without pointing fingers. It was awkward and messy, but we talked, really talked, for the first time in a long time. I tried to see things from his side, and I think he did the same, at least a little.
Putting in the Work
- Having more real conversations. Not just about logistics, but about our feelings and dreams, like we used to.
- Trying to be more affectionate. Even small gestures, like holding hands or a random hug, can make a difference.
- Actually listening to each other. This one’s tough, especially when you think you already know what the other person is going to say.
Honestly, it’s been a rollercoaster. Some days, it feels like we’re making progress. Other days, it’s like we’re back at square one. But I’m not giving up. I realized that saving a marriage isn’t about grand gestures or quick fixes. It’s about showing up every day, even when it’s hard, and choosing to work together. It’s not easy, but I think it’s worth it. We’ll see what happens. I’ll keep you guys posted.
